Suede and Sunshade

  • R is Short for Rumination

    I recently performed this poem at an open mic night. I honestly didn’t have an inkling of what I was going to perform until I saw the crowd, comprised mostly of teens. My inspiration for this poem comes from a Junji Ito story about a young boy whose pain became one with the house he lived in. I believe it was a part of his story collection ‘Lovesickness.’ More significantly, my own dealings with rumination, being a hopeless neurotic and all. Usually, I do not post on Wednesdays, but why not break rules, even if they are your own?

    Rumination

    Rumination involves repetitive thinking or dwelling on negative feelings and distress and their causes and consequences. Girls are more likely to ruminate than boys.

    My room is an open source
    To try and heal open sores
    Licked on by dirty dogs
    Boils like on frogs
    To clean battle scars 
    With tears in jars

    I feel the safest in this place
    I can hide the fear on my face
    I do not have a diary
    But I know my thoughts stay beside me

    This is my therapy
    For clarity, most of the time this is a rarity
    Wishful thinking, how dare of me!

    I sing wayward songs of female woes
    Of my soul being exposed
    Of snakes in the shadows
    Of a heart and mind that come to blows

    My room, where I practice rumination
    Is a reflection, on my frustrations

    Written on October 15th, 2023. Two days before my birthday.

    -Sunshine

    ☀︎Like, comment, subscribe, and share for more content☀︎

    ,
    , , , , , , , ,

    . . .

  • Never expose your pain!

    (Originally Posted On Opulence in the Divine)

    Never expose your pain! 

    Isaiah 40:29 He gives power to the weak and strength to the powerless. (NLT) 

    Introduction 

    Hi babes, welcome back to my blog Opulence in the Divine! This post will be a lot shorter to what I normally write, shorter than the last post. I think of this one to introduce a series of posts I want to make about the healing process. I am going in this with no outline and spit balling from my soul. Without further ado, here is Never expose your pain!  

    Clarification on what I mean. 

    I do not want to come across as saying that you should bottle up your emotions. Fighting silent battles only increases feelings of isolation and stalls your healing! What I mean is that you should only show your pain to those who care and have your best interest at heart!  

    The uncertainty of exposing your pain to strangers and the danger of exposing your pain to enemies.

     You might think pain is something that should be avoided, but you must experience it to grow. Pain is a form of energy that comes from the heart, much like love. Also, like love, not everyone deserves to share your pain. It’s no question that the internet and social media has become an entire world on its own. Connecting people who you wouldn’t ever meet organically. This in itself is not wrong, as there have been many meaningful relationships that have started online, platonic and romantic alike. The issue is everyone is not your friend and/or lover. Strangers can be wolves and sheep’s clothing, not only that, exposing your vulnerability to people who could care less is just unnecessary.  

    Now, enemies. You might be thinking “Well that’s stupid to show people who hurt you your hurt”. It’s not stupid, it’s a mistake. Think about this. Let’s say someone ghosted you through text but you still follow each other on social media, your shocked and hurt that they did that, but they seem to be going on happily posting as if nothing happened. Now you start to post shady and cryptic messages in an effort to A) hope they see it and feel bad and B) still stay connected to this person. You want them to “share” your pain. Well, it’s not sharing if the pain is not reciprocated. Worse, you’re exposing your vulnerability and letting that person know that they have power over you. That was oddly specific. It’s an example I can give you from my own experience of being in pain.   

    So, for the love of God, please do not vent about, cry about, or lash out your pain to strangers or enemies on social media!  

    Surrounding yourself with loved ones and angels! 

    As said, don’t expose your pain to anybody, but don’t hide it either from those who truly love you. Sharing your pain is not about them taking on your struggle. Rather offering you a safe space where you can find comfort in knowing that you are not alone.  

    Wrap-up and final thoughts! 

    And scene! Okay this was a pretty informal one. I wrote this while at work, and I just wanted to say what was in my heart for real. Now I know I probably sound hypocritical when I say don’t share stuff with strangers then I go and share something personal with strangers. Well for one, I don’t consider you all strangers because the only people who read these are my close family and friends. Two, it’s my way of showing you that we all are human. I really cannot talk about issues and give advice if I haven’t experienced them firsthand. Well babes, I am tired. I hope you all stay blessed and beautiful. Take care, see you in the next one! 

    Love and Kisses Always! 

    XOXOXO 

    -Syd 

    , , , , , ,

    . . .

Anger Art Artist Blog Post Christianity Diary Entry Divine Divine Feminine dreams Emotions Feminine Energy Feminism God Grief Happiness Healing Heartbreak hope loneliness Love music Pain Poem poetry Relationships rumination sadness Self Help Self Love Sexuality Sisterhood Songs Songwriting sorrows spilled ink Spirituality Spoken Word tears Toxicity valentine’s day woes Womanhood Women Writers writing

Designed with WordPress